Lake Atitlán: Up Close and Cozy

I did not pick the name “Lake Views” for this column, but it stuck nonetheless. So I should probably make the lake my topic at least once. There is no counting the number of times—it is too many—that I have read that Aldous Huxley (1894-1963) called Atitlán the world’s most beautiful lake. He would know, being one of the best-traveled […]

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Charlie Brown in Santiago Atitlán

Or, How the Peanuts gang finds relief from the big northern syndicate this Christmas When I was a child, the holiday season’s shortest half-hour passed during the broadcast of Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown. That, and the other seasonal Peanuts specials, were always over too quickly. These cartoons enraptured everyone—even grownups who otherwise despised cartoons, like those vapid Flintstones. I might […]

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Why October 12 is Not “Colón Day”

I do not know how many of you in Readerland wonder why we say “Christopher Columbus” instead of Cristóbal Colón. But this time the wonderment comes from within this magazine. Our copy editor, Matt Bokor, has decided to flatter me by thinking I might be able to run with this question. OK, Matt — here goes. Maybe, among the group […]

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In Pursuit of Goatsuckers

Speculation on the elusive and mischievous Chupacabra Goatsuckers are not something you see every day. In fact, they are not something that most of us will ever see on any day. Nevertheless, so many Central Americans believe in their existence that, for their sakes, we need to give a fair hearing to the possibility. Whether goatsuckers exist or not, they […]

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3Q and the Tomato Paste War

Dealing with Lilliputian cans of sauce and questionable quantification quirkiness on our retail shelves Tomato paste is mentioned in Guatemala’s Constitution. I have yet to find the paragraph, section, and clause, but I’m certain it is there. The law in question requires all cans of tomato paste sold here to be the 6-ounce variety. You may occasionally find tomato paste […]

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The Heartbreak of HDD

Some simple steps to avoid the dangers that Hemispherical Discognizant Disorder can cause. If you are a foreigner in Central America, some people in the home country think that you spend Christmas in sweltering heat and humidity. “Oh, yeah,” they say. “Down there, the seasons are reversed and all that.” The charitable response, the one I usually give, is to […]

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Birthday Parties

My sons are still in their cavity-prone years, so I attended 19 birthday parties last year—three for my boys and 16 for their playmates. Each had its odd turn or twist. To avoid the charge of ethnocentrism, I’ll admit here that Central Americans do no worse a job of honoring their birthday boys and girls than do parents in the […]

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